We need to stop “Dad Bashing”!

bootsWhat would happen if we loved our husbands?  We as a society need to stop “Dad bashing”!  I can’t even tell you how many times I’ve gone to the grocery store, or to Walmart, and overheard conversations between other women about their husbands.  Lets be realistic, men are not perfect, neither are us women! They have their own way of doing things, they have their own agenda, they have their own priorities, and sometimes…just sometimes…we don’t see eye to eye. I’d like to interject into these conversations and say “Hey…is that really the way you see you husband?  Is that how you want your children and others to see your husband?”  But I don’t…I walk away and I think to myself “am I any different?”, I’d like to think that I am.

My husband is not a perfect man…and I’m far from perfect myself, but what gets my goat is the way husbands and fathers are portrayed in the media…Homer Simpson (the Simpsons), Peter Griffin (Family Guy), Ray Romano (Everybody Loves Raymond), just to name a few.  These characters are doltish, lazy, and/or lack social and sometimes hygienic graces.  This cannot be how we see our husbands? The man who took your breath away the first time he swept you up in his arms and kissed you.  The man who waited 30 minutes for you to finish getting ready for your date and then told you how beautiful you were instead of being upset with you.

We as wives and mothers should build our men up, not tear them down.  We should never make deprecating about him in public or in front of our children. We should be teaching our children the things that make “Daddy” special to our family.  And we should be telling our husbands we still think he’s gorgeous (even if he does have a few extra pounds), make him feel desirable.  Make him feel like he is wanted and that he matters in our lives and the lives of our children.

My husband serves in the military, he’s gone from time to time.  When he’s home I try to do things especially for him, cook his favorite meal, or sit and watch one of his favorite TV shows even thought I think it’s dead boring.  When we first started dating I had no interest in some of his hobbies, but after a few years I began to take an interest, just so that I could spend time with him.  My time with him is precious, I could lose him at any moment.

What if…WHAT IF…we loved our husbands!  What if we did our part to make their lives a more pleasant place to be.  What would happen…as a social experiment…if we built them up instead of tearing them down?  Would there be less divorce, less infidelity, less spousal abuse?   Well…would there be?

 

2 thoughts on “We need to stop “Dad Bashing”!

  1. I completely agree. I’ve felt this way for a long time. I must say though, that as far as spousal abuse and infidelity, no amount of husband (or wife) bashing justifies that extreme behavior, and I don’t think the they are as connected as you think. But I do believe that divorce rates would tank and that respect levels would soar. It would make our society and world a better place, for sure. I also want to point out though, that although husband (or wife) bashing is also not justified, we would do well to consider that if we overhear it, perhaps there is more to the story than we know. Perhaps spousal abuse is actually going on, whether physical, or emotional/mental. For some women (or men), maybe their spouse doesn’t patiently wait for those extra 30 minutes (or even 5 minutes) of getting ready and then tell them how beautiful they are. Maybe 5 extra minutes puts them into a rage of belittling and name calling, and maybe the victim’s coping method is anger and bashing when they feel safe. You never know what goes on behind closed doors or what another’s experience is. Again, I completely agree with you, but I would point out that we should all have compassion when we witness it and realize that it could be a cry for help, no matter how that person comes across. But we can always work on and improve ourselves and be better examples to those around us.

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